Olympic Blog Post #1

I got home late last night and was egged on by my mom to "turn on the TV and watch the Olympics!"

"Alright already," I said.

I'm afraid that nothing will ever compare to the opening of the 1992 games when a Spanish archer lit the Olympic torch with an arrow from 500 feet. Spectacular. Nothing comes close. Last night's torch lighting? I get a better flame from my backyard grill.

My family will be disppointed but I'm just not a super huge fan of the O-games. The Olympic ideal of citius altius & fortius (faster, higher, stronger)combined with an international appeal of peace, love and harmony is nice in theory and we all want to believe it really exists - I did until I was 20 years old - but while the Russians were marching into the arena TWO NIGHTS AGO, their tanks were rumbling toward Georgia.....the Iranians, Syrians, Moroccons, Saudi's et al absolutely hate our westernized infidel guts. It's nice that they at least hate us in the name of their religion. Does this confuse no one else?

China? 1.3 billion people. 1/5 of the earth's population. Big army. Hmmmmmnnn....interesting.

Okay, so let's just set aside all the BS lovey dovey PR and get kicking some serious ass and winning the medal count OKAY?

Some predictions:

I don't think Michael Phelps will win 8 gold medals. The guy is amazing, the best swimmer ever but I just think that something will trip him up...a teammate in a relay may falter, another swimmer will have the race of their lives. I say he gets 6 gold, 2 silver.

Our ghetto basketballers? Nice to see Kobe acting nice and playing with others during the opening ceremonies. And who doesn't love LeBron? Gold Gold Gold. Easy.

Sprints? USA and Jamaica
Marathon? Easy, ALWAYS the guys from Africa. They run everywhere.
Horse stuff: Brits
Yachting: See Horse Stuff
Anything to do with official's scoring: China (tie goes to the host country - it's true look it up)
Beach Volleyball: USA
Volleyball: USA
Boxing: don't care
Baseball: Cuba
Diving: Rigged
Gymnastics: See DIVING
Rowing: don't care
Archery: Shoot an apple off the top of someone's head like William Tell. Then I'll be impressed.
Shooting: Now we're talking.
Modern Pentathalon: Quick, name the 5 disciplines. See, no one cares
Fencing: Use a gun - its faster
Tennis: I reluctantly grant tennis a spot in the o-games....barely. Nadal and Ivanovic take gold.
Table Tennis: Asian's dominate.
Weightlifting: At last, something measureable. Lift the most weight, you win.
Track and Field: See WEIGHTLIFTING
Cycling: Nah, we just had the TDF and no one knows who won that right? We're Americans, we drive cars.
Field Hockey: YAWN. Saw it in Atlanta.
Trampoline: C'mon man. What next? Monkey bars? Swing set? THREE LEGGED SACK RACE?
Sychronized Swimming: I'm outta of there

Too bad about the American citizen who was killed today in Beijing by a nutty Chinaman who then killed himself by jumping off a 2-story building (I would have gone much higher to make sure...you know...). Sadly, we have to expect stuff like this in the world today. I also think we will see more sad news from China.

Peace