Bubble Kids

I've been watching the NBA conference finals and keep seeing the same lame ad on the TV that emphasizes wearing seatbelts and that the cops are on the lookout to ticket offenders.....then my brain starting comparing the year 2010 with my ja,ja, ja, Generation (BTW that's a song title by The Who....they are a band....still quite popular with middle age folks).

I was reared in the 1960's and '70's.....cars had seat belts (they were called lap belts back then since the use of the three point belt [lap and shoulder strap] wasn't mandated until the late '70's early '80's and applied only to front seat passengers - it's true I looked it up) but no one used them. They were usually tucked deep down between the cushions of the large land yachts of the day.... Buick Bonnevilles, Cadillac Coup de Villes, Lincoln Continentals and so forth.

Back then I don't remember car seats either. Kids have car seats today as complex as the first space shuttle. They transform into playpens and carrying beds. They also plug into strollers and chairs to ensure that junior is adequately protected from head to toe and side to side. I think they have airbags too.

We were hauled around by the scruff of our necks, dumped into rickety strollers and when mom had to slam the breaks on, her right arm would shoot out to stop us from plowing into the dashboard. Worked every time. Carseat?



Today, kids are strapped in tight and stare zombie-like at built-in mini-tv's that play their favorite movies or games while parents sit up front and fret about the little tykes safety, they worry about their mortgage, their 401K, their jobs....it's a shitty deal for young parents.

Back in the glory days, when America was kicking ass and taking names, we boys would play with plastic green soldiers or lego's or Lincoln Logs in the rear end of station wagons with the back window rolled down and we'd toss all sorts of stuff out the opening - especially on the deserted freeways of the American west.



This was part of being kid. If we were stupid enough to fall out of the back of the car, which I never did, mothers would certainly rub some dirt on the wound and kids would suck it up.

Today wearing a seatbelt is mandatory - people can be ticketed for failing to buckle up. I'm all for seatbelt use but to have law enforcement ticket folks for failing to buckle up is ridiculous and a testament to government sticking their nose into another area of our lives.



Some other observations:

When I was a kid,the only suntan lotion I can recall was Coppertone. Back then the Coppertone girl was an advertisement showing a young blond girl in pigtails staring in surprise as a Cocker Spaniel sneaks up behind her and pulls down her swimsuit bottoms, exposing her pale white butt in contrast with her tanned body. This photo is burned into my generation's collective memory. Check it out:



Now we have lotion for dark skin, medium skin, light skin, dry skin, oily skin; 4 SPF, 8 SPF and on up to 100 SPF (for my sister-in-law and nuke blasts). Geez, slap some sunscreen on and get out there. Get a sunburn? Too bad. At least that means you actually played outside.

We didn't use hand sanitizer either. We washed our hands before mealtime. Sort of.



Mom's would holler, "Wash your hands," and then sniff 'em to make sure we did it. Usually, we did such a bad job, the towel used to dry off our hands would get dirty. Usually we never quite dried our hands off completely either.

I also remember the scaulding hot days of football practice where my teammates and I stood in line and gulped water from a hose that I'm pretty sure had been there for years. Hell, it may still be there.




No fancy vitamin water, or gatorade or bottled water for us....or fruit snacks at halftime. I'm not necessarily dogging how kids have it today, I'm just pointing out the differences between generations....and how wimpy kids are today. It's true. Look it up.

When we were in Peru a few years ago we met a wonderful family and spent several evenings in their home playing a simple board game. I playfully asked out loud, "Where is the cord to plug in?" Laughter all around from Janae and the boys - except for the Peruvians who politely just smiled. They didn't get it. Back in the day we played OUTSIDE until the streetlights came on. Today, not so much.

From 1974 to 1976 I rode a bicycle to school, gasp, WITHOUT a helmet. Nowadays, everything from skate boarding to biking to skiing seems to require or strongly advocate wearing a helmet. Again, the idea is well founded I suppose, but what next? Airbags on bikes? I will laugh out loud the day I see kids walking to school with helmets on. Should you see this, it means the apocalypse is near.




Today, alas, kids are raised in a bubble. I wouldn't say our kids were raised that way (they are now 23 and 21 years old respectively), but the current generation sure is. Laughably so.

It's not that we were reckless parents, we just raised our boys up to learn from their own mistakes and to hopefully not make the same mistake twice.

Today's kids need to learn how to lose. They need to learn, by themselves, that the stove is hot....that dogs can bite and that cats have sharp claws. They need to fall off their bikes a few dozen times to learn how to pop a wheelie, hop a curb or fly off a makeshift ramp of plywood. They need to look people in the eyes when they talk to them instead of nodding and texting and grunting, "uh uh."

I mention the above since I'll be a grandfather in 4 months. We'll see if the Gold Bricks I gave to my son will be passed on to the next generation. These bits of wisdom contain the best stuff my mom and dad could offer up and what we could improve upon....yet falls short of complete bubble isolation.

Let's hope Alec was a good listener.