Shoulder MRI today. Radiologist was preparing to insert dye into my shoulder and asked, "You want the anesthetic first then the dye, or just the dye?"
I looked at the needle and laughed. It was tiny.
I said, "Just shoot the dye and let's get it over with."
This time it didn't hurt, but having a needle stuck in my shoulder for about 3 minutes while chatting up the doc just seemed strange.
Five minutes after the injection, my left shoulder and arm felt like I had lead in it. My arm didn't swing quite right. It tingled. I giggled.
Next up was the MRI machine. Can you say: Claustrophobia? In the past I had to place a washcloth over my eyes and think happy thoughts. Today I was better prepared but still had to grit my teeth and still think happy thoughts. I forgot about the racket these machines make. While the machine is doing it's thing, it sounds like someone is on the outside beating it with a baseball bat. It would get quiet, the technician would mumble something I couldn't hear, and then the noise would start up all over again. After the umpteenth time, I was pulled out of the tube and couldn't yank out my earplugs fast enough and pitched them in the trash. Whew.
"You're not done," said Nick, working his way out from behind the control room.
"Now you're gonna charge my insurance company another $50 bucks for earplugs," I said.
"One more set with your arm twisted over your head."
"Great."
The MRI machine should have a big dollar sign as it's logo. Nick said the they cost around a million bucks and that an MRI like mine cost $2 grand....for less than an hour in the tube.
I thought the entire gig would last from 9am to 10am tops. I wandered out of the facility at 11:15am thoroughly convinced that both of my boys need to be doctors. Even with the economy in the crapper, people were lined up 3 deep getting x-rays, MRI's, CT scans and what not. And judging from past physician bills, one year of med school has to devoted to billing and fees. Doctor and facility fees are worse than buying an airline ticket. Rarely are two bills ever the same. I think they throw darts at a board and laugh like hell all the way to the bank.
6 comments:
Dude, why do you think I'm skipping the family business? To "help" people? Please.
Sheesh-I think you need to change your blog to medical updates. Remember BIlly Crystal in City Slickers. I think for your birthday this year I'm going to get you a gift card at Quest Labs.
Muah!
Trent,
How did the visit to WV go? Any updates on Med School?
Janae,
A gift card to NV Spine, Walgreens and Desert Radiology would be most appreciated.
I'll make a homemade coupon book with a bunch of coupons that say, "Free Arthroscopic Shoulder Surgery, Free Hip Replacement, Etc." It'll be like the good ol days when coupon books were handy for every holiday!
ACR
Seeing the picture of the scanner brought back bad memories of all the tests I was having this time last year - I hate those things.
That needle in the shoulder feels weird, I couldnt lift my arm for about 12 hours afterwards.
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